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Why Long Distance Is Worth It

February 7, 2012 Opinions 10 Comments
Long Distance - PRO
Christie Margaris
Staff Writer

Illustration by Irene Wang

When my editor pitched the idea of writing an article on the value of long distance relationships in honor of the upcoming Valentine’s Day holiday, I jumped at the opportunity. Not only because I am female, and therefore have an inherent appreciation for any holiday which calls for gifts in the form of lingerie and jewelry, but also because I have spent the last six months in a long distance relationship of my own.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. As a self-proclaimed “expert” on long distance relationships, I can attest to this statement. My boyfriend lives 855 miles away-in other words, 855 miles too far. But despite the separation we must endure, there is no one I would rather spend my time calling, texting, Skyping, etc. And let me tell you, it’s not easy. Some say physical separation fosters emotional separation. But my experience in the past six months has proven that this is not the case. Are long distance relationships worth it? Absolutely.

So what is the key to making it work? There are several things to keep in mind. First, trust is essential. If you’re constantly freaking out about your lover getting cozy with someone else, then something isn’t working.

Communication is key. I make sure to keep my significant other up to date, even on the most boring of days-just to let him in on my life.

And third, you need to maintain a sense of balance between your relationship and your social life. I still make plenty of time to go to the gym, attend my classes, and go out with friends on the weekends, but at the end of the day, what I am really looking forward to is going home, bundling up in my covers and making that long awaited goodnight phone call.

Many of my friends don’t understand why I put up with it.

“There are thousands of available guys in Isla Vista,” they tell me. “Can’t you just find someone here?”

But as anyone else in a faithful, committed long distance relationship knows, it doesn’t exactly work like that. I have spent the past year and a half in IV and have met my fair share of men here. And surprise, surprise-no one here even comes close to what I have 855 miles away. The time away is stressful, sometimes overbearing. But when you finally see that person again-after weeks of missing them, talking to them on the phone every night, texting them all day-there is no better feeling than being in their arms once again. Trust me.

So basically what I have to say is this: maybe long distance relationships aren’t for you. Maybe you need that physical chemistry to make your relationship work. But if you know in your heart that this person is the only one you want to be with, regardless of the distance, I say go for it. Long distance relationships are insightful for many; they teach you about the importance of trust, and they tend to make you be ten times more appreciative of your significant other than you would be if you were surrounded by them 24/7. At least, that’s how it is in my case.

My boyfriend is my best friend. And when I’m having a rough day at school, he is still always there to answer the phone and help me through it. I know that sounds corny, but it’s the truth.

That pretty much sums up what I have to say about the most romantic time of year. For those who didn’t understand long distance before, hopefully this clears a few things up. The man of my dreams may be in a different state and a different time zone, but he has all my heart. And I wouldn’t do it any other way.

Currently there are "10 comments" on this Article:

  1. [...] Why Long Distance Is Worth It Not only because I am female, and therefore have an inherent appreciation for any holiday which calls for gifts in the form of lingerie and jewelry, but also because I have spent the last six months in a long distance relationship of my own. Read more on The Bottom Line [...]

  2. Lydia says:

    This was an extremely encouraging post[= I just started a LD relationship (almost 2k miles) with a military man that I happen to adore. We are both committed to eachother, realize that it is going to be difficult, and we are both ready and willing to go above and beyond to make this work. Everyone has been warning me off saying that we are doomed to fail. I just want to thank you for writing this because you are giving hope to couples everywhere <3

  3. Sabrina says:

    well, i have been in LD 2 months ago. and we like really not close. he just cant be trusted. but i love him. but i dont know maybe he’s lying to me. what should i do ? we just can text nothing else. he’s from doncaster, and im from singapore. 14,790.9 km. its really far tho :( what should i do now ? to make it working out.

  4. dur says:

    oh mann.. ive been on LD for 2 months now and its all true.. its so tough.

    hes got bad internet currently and all we talk about is being deppressed about being so far fromm each other..
    he has such a negative attitude… going all “this relationship wont last long… i want it to work though”

    what can i say to make him be abit more positive about this relationship work?
    by the way…we wont be able to visit each other until… like 5 years from now D:

  5. Andie says:

    So me and my girlfriend have been in a LDR for about a month now. She is in Germany and I am in Los Angeles. I have never met anyone compared to how amazing she is. We talk everyday on the phone and message non-stop throughout the day. You would think living in Los Angeles there would be such an array of women here – yes there might be but not for me. I have had my share of going on dates and meeting women. I am going to meet her in April for the first time, also it would be my first time flying I am kind of nervous about that but I would do anything to meet the woman of my dreams. Even if that includes something as scary as flying 5k miles. Thanks for reading (:

  6. andrew says:

    omg on the 28th me and my partner would have been in a l d s for 2 years and i thought wat cqn i giv her so i thought id write abt my experiance in a l d s and i wrote just abt exactly what u have but i said u shouldent try to have a l d r untill u know how hard it actually is because its basically self tourture but if u come out the other side nothing will come between u and ur partner because u fought too hard put in too much time and basically been to hell and kicked the shit out of the devel to be together knowones gunba get in the way of that TRUE LOVE THE MOST POWERFULL THING KNOWN TO MANKIND FACT !!!

  7. andrew says:

    for those who r doubting there relationship in my opinion if ur partner loves u they will do anything to keep in touch b4 i met my gf i hadent owned a mobile phone for 3 years i took out a contract phone just so we could talk everywere after i went to thai to meet her as soon as i got bk to the uk i bought a laptop so we could sleep together last year her phone broke so she could only talk me on her laptop so i asked her mom to buy her new phone abd i gave her mom the money the next time i visited i go bk to thai next month her laptop is very old soqzzQ im taking her mine cuz i have a tablet now being able to talk and keep in touch everyday is the most crucail part to make a ldr work talking everyday most of the time abt nothing importent means even though ur partner is miles away there still a big part of ur life and although

  8. andrew says:

    for those who r doubting there relationship in my opinion if ur partner loves u they will do anything to keep in touch b4 i met my gf i hadent owned a mobile phone for 3 years i took out a contract phone just so we could talk everywere after i went to thai to meet her as soon as i got bk to the uk i bought a laptop so we could sleep together last year her phone broke so she could only talk me on her laptop so i asked her mom to buy her new phone abd i gave her mom the money the next time i visited i go bk to thai next month her laptop is very old soqzzQ im taking her mine cuz i have a tablet now being able to talk and keep in touch everyday is the most crucail part to make a ldr work talking everyday most of the time abt nothing importent means even though ur partner is miles away there still a big part of ur life and although ur apart ull find that u actually find out more abt each other then u would in a conventional relationship it may sound weird but i can actually tell how my gfs feeling buy the she texts me the tone of her voice or the facal expressions i love my gf deeply and nothing will stop me achieveing my goal of living with her

  9. 'Ashling says:

    I’m so glad I seen this I met a guy I really like and who likes me back we had been on a few dates and I told him I was moving an hour away and he was fine with that as any guy shud. Then he ended up having to move back to Scotland (I’m in London) and so we haven’t been able to see each other for about 3 week’s now. We speak on the phone nearly every day or text if we don’t today we discussed continuing seeing each other as its so far away and he isn’t working yet but I like him enough to want to give it a go and he wants to also. And your article gives me the hope that with work it will work out. There is a lot to be discussed but hopefully when we see each other again we can set out ground rules and go from there

  10. gabriela says:

    At least ur still living and ur still in this world me and him been talking for a year now and I have to wait 2 more years to see him :( I love him and he loves me if my family finds out they would laugh at my face man people can really put you down. Sometimes I think its stupid but I just can’t let go but I know 2 years will pass fast and I’ll be in his arms and when I am our connection will be better than any relationship and when people say long distance don’t last long how many close relationships do you know that last at least 2 years? Not much huh and if a close distance last 2 years that’s the year I’ll be in his arm ohh 2016/2017 hurryyy

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