Kamelia Kaveh
Contributing Writer
“A Little Life” by Hanya Yanagihara, a National Book Award finalist, has been and continues to be popular on “Book Tok,” the community-named, book-focused side of the popular social media app TikTok. Despite the book being known for the immense despair it evokes, readers willingly choose to read the heartbreaking story that will often bring them to tears.
The book follows four college roommates — JB, Malcolm, William, and Jude — and their journey navigating the complex path of adulthood, while facing the lingering traumas of their past as well as the challenges yet to come. At the heart of the novel is Jude St. Francis, a mathematics student who chose to pursue a career in law. The novel shares his past as an orphan who was never adopted, addressing sensitive topics such as sexual assault, self harm, and physical abuse. Such themes leave readers — myself included — feeling overwhelmingly nauseated, consumed by a profound sadness regarding what the character has endured.
Jude, once a child with no wealth, title, or connections, creates a new life for himself. He becomes a well-respected lawyer at a top law firm, allowing him to live in a lavish large apartment in New York City, and surrounding himself with newfound relationships made up of colleagues and a new found family he has built. Because of his disturbing past — revealed gradually as the novel progresses — Jude is constantly thinking that he does not deserve all the good in his life. He fears that one day he will lose it all. As readers, we are drawn into Jude’s pain and his peculiar fear that at any moment his happiness can vanish. Each page grows more and more infuriating as we yearn to see him live a happy life, knowing that he, of all people, does in fact deserve a good life: he has worked hard for the current life he has created, one filled with joy and success due to his efforts.
However, Jude’s approach to finding ways to cope with life’s difficulties reveals a crucial theme: at times when life begins to settle, offering comfort and good moments, we often choose to revert back to our old ways. For instance, when asked to be adopted by Harold and his wife Julia, both individuals Jude dearly loves and cares for, he feels such joy that he is fearful it will all be taken from him. Despite the fact that this is everything he has wanted, during his adoption process he is very distant and avoidant, reverting back to his unhealthy coping mechanisms. We find comfort in the sadness, loneliness, and familiarity of what we are used to, even when it harms us. Jude has finally found a family that loves and cares for him, that wants to adopt him despite his age (40 years old). Instead of embracing the good of this situation, Jude can only think of the many ways that his adoptive parents, Harold and Julia, will regret their decisions. He believes the desires of the well known past will surpass the fears of the unknown future.
Reading this novel may help you realize that the anger you feel towards Jude might be a reflection of something within ourselves: the difficulty of believing we, too, deserve the good that comes our way. Whether you want to cry or find connection with a literary charter, or simply read a popular novel, this book can offer comfort. It reminds readers that the experiences of the past do not define our present selves.
Sometimes, holding on to what we know, will sacrifice new experiences we could have. Let this story connect with you and help you reflect. While there may be comfort in your past, it does not define you; an entire future is waiting for you to enjoy. Similar to Jude, you experience good and bad, bad and good. Regardless of what point of life you are in — high or low — reading “A Little Life” will help you realize that your fearful thoughts are irrational and that there truly are people who care and love for you despite what you may believe. The heartfelt story by Hanya Yanagihara explains why so many readers are gravitating towards it, even knowing it will inflict pain. “A Little Life” brings into perspective that even at the worst moments, there is value in the little, mundane parts of life.